Plato, give me some space!

On: The projects in my bag (begging for attention), how my mind works & a little peace and quiet

Please, I need some rest.
Just one minute in this nervous rush that I call "daily routine" these days. I did it yesterday. Went for a walk with my diary. Inhaling the silence. Some damn peace & quiet.
Okay not real silence. 

Crickets in the knee-high grass, music from a festival not far away, random lonely people strolling by talking softly to their dogs... or their wives.
I wasn't searching for the quietest place. The goal was to just be freed from my thoughts and troubles and plans and projects for a rare moment.

Take a pause sometimes.
Really. This Be Dottie's videos help me doing so at times. One of the recent ones kind of got stuck in my head. I feel like she gets what's happening inside of my mind. 

My very own "head room" has been unorganized these days. Chaotic. 

Since July started, I've been trying the hardest not to become a hot mess. Please don't even ask about the real bedroom I actually live in... The last two weeks, I rarely cooked meals at home. 

• First excuse: Summer. I just couldn't eat warm meals. (#tbh)
• Second excuse: Work. I spent many days folding T-shirts (YES! I got a job! San Francisco here I come!) and printing them. That can be cooler than it sounds - creative people with cool ideas. But also suckier - tees for bachelor parties (-.-). 

> Note to Myself: Don't do a bachelorette-party. Just don't. 

The point is, I was busy doing stuff in the city centre (T-Shirts & University)all the time, so I didn't really got to being home at daytime at all. Lunch break either meant a sandwich or running to the cafeteria. So many sandwiches... It's not only annoying, it's expensive, too.

Our crossmedia project started. We will do journalistic research (& jokes, I guess) on "Yuccies". Since June, the internet is full of them. So that's a thing. 

Writing an article, a radio broadcast and recording it. Planning and filming a TV feature. This includes: Finding interview partners, drawing a storyboard, writing a script, researching information, taking pictures, cutting the scenes, montage... Okay, I don't want to complain. It's work, but it's fun.

Not a very new meme, but (unfortunately) still relevant.

The not so fun part: Exams are coming (Spanish tomorrow - No me gusta). But Spanish looks like a joke, compared to my Politics exam. Learning all the political philosophers and theorists is as much fun as it sounds! From Plato, over Marx to Rawls - Gotta know them all!(what up, Pokémon reference?!)

What I like about learning this stuff, is that, even though most of the people we talked about in the lecture ("Einführung in die Entwicklungslinien und Geschichte politischer Theorie" = lovely) are male (FEMINISM- tbh) and DEAD, their topics are still relevant!

They wrote about how to build a functioning state (and believe me, EVERYONE had his own REAL, PERFECT, DIFFERENT idea 'bout it...*rolls eyes while studying*), what people are like and how they behave in society. They talked about love and "Glückseligkeit". They looked for the essences in human beings (okay, some neglected that there are any) and finally, some covered even the meaning of life.

For me this shows that there are indeed such things as "universal ideas" (Plato would pat me on the shoulder, I guess); ideas that last longer than a lifetime or an era. 

Ideas that always concern humans. In all times.

That's why we can still profit from all the endless hours of meditation and reflection these old wise men surely have put in their works. (And now you can even watch some of them easily explained on youtube, thanks to TheSchoolOfLife)

Yeah, okay, it's kind of okay I guess. But it's a lot to learn by heart.

What else? Me and my drama group want to have our play on stage soon. I hope we find a stage, because our planning lacked a bit and we started our search very late. Hints are always welcome!

Argh, and that Essay I haven't started yet...  that's due to the 24th of July. And all this time, the media center (where we cut and lend camera equipment) is closed. Also the University Library, because they move places this exact month. Yep, I'll stop whining and start writing instead, soon.

Did I mention I went to a festival again? I didn't? Oopsy daisies!

I know, this post (especially, after such a long period of not uploading ANYTHING) is a bit like that annoying conversation with this oh sooo busy friend of yours. 

"I've got so much work and studying to do - I barely find time for myself, not to mention for doing anything with my friends" - that person is complaining over and over.

While you are here asking yourself silently: Why did they come to meet me anyways? - If they're too busy and won't even talk about anything else than the stuff they got to do at the moment... blablabla

So I try to stop being that friend! 

Hey, even in my studies (that may sound like a "fairytale-dream-kind-of-media-you-don't-have-to-do-anything"-thing to people) you sometimes have tense periods of studying and working! Cool?

And yeah, this kind of stress makes me messy, because I prefer not walking around with a pocket calendar all the time - checking the dates like a freaking business woman - And I prefer having time for grocery shopping and cooking.

Maybe even cleaning.

I took time to clean my room this week. Because, like Dottie says, sometimes you have to clean your bedroom to clean your head room. 

(Yes, this was a rhyme and a wisdom - I'm an aspiring rapper.)

Unlike my boyfriend (subtle relationship criticism, right here!), I am willing to always slide in some hours to spend time with him or my friends. Good thing, I'm doing my crossmedia project with Lena, a friend from my studies. Work time that equals time with a good friend is half as bad ;) ! By the way, check out her blog, she's an awesome photographer and hers is much cooler than mine.

Speaking of blogs... I don't know if you know but if you know me better, you know for sure... that I write in German for another blog these days, a blog from our field of study that we brought to new life a month ago.

You can catch a glimpse of my projects (like the short film we produced, remember?) there, and you can read (only if you are fluent in german, of course) blog entries - surprise: By me and other people from my studies.

Like recently I was ranting about why everyone wears BIRKENSTOCKs or in another entry about my hometown.

There comfy, yes. But what else?

This long entry has to come to an end, now. (Why? Cuz I decided to, that's why)

I hope that I was able to give you insight into some aspects of my life that are keeping me on the run this hot July of 2015. Why political philosophers and spanish speaking latino lovers follow me in my dreams (I'm not joking here! HELP!), what is going to happen next and why I really anticipate summer break... Like any other student on the campus, I guess.

... and why you sometimes have to take a festival break! Just to not go mad.

Life Goes On

On: A trip to the past, Film-making, & Diary Headlines

I'm standing there. On a bridge across the Seine again, after all these months. It feels like last year, it smells like last year - but it is now. And my time in Paris is over and gone. Regardless of whether I'm there again or not. 

Everything is like it was, or so similar you hardly find the changes. But still: It's over.

This trip to Paris, these 8 days were not only a rollercoaster of emotions: happy, joyful, disappointed, sad, lonely, hopeful, empty, cozy, excited. 

They were a trip to the past. I accept this, but I still enjoyed every second of it. 

My favourite one. Promenade Plantée, Paris, March 2015

Finally, I've been to Pintes & Frites AGAIN (been there at least 4 times), the newly renovated Picasso Museum (soooo good, honestly), discovered a new bar, celebrated the birthday of my colleague in Kindergarten last year (who was in Paris, too, by chance), rested on the Promenade Plantée, danced into the night in one of my favourite night clubs (SHOWCASE!) under a bridge, met someone new, got excited to see 'The Subways' playing live at Le Trabendo, saw all my lovely girls from the picture of my bedside table again, stayed with my host family and played babysitter again (how I missed it... -.-), bought new books at Shakespeare & Co. (#NEED), ate a lot of cheese, went out eating in a fancy restaurant (with a creepy waiter, though), sat on the borders of the Seine and played Cards Against Humanity.

Doesn't that sound like hell of a trip? (To say it The Subways-like:) Oh Yeah! 

Side note: I'm gonna spread some of the mobile pictures I took randomly in this post, so don't get too distracted. [and: enjoy! ;) ]

Obla Di Obla Da - Life goes on, bra. La-la how life goes on - The Beatles

Life goes on. Here, back in Freiburg, my film project was waiting for me impatiently. Today, on the third day of turning the film, I'm excited about the nice pictures we took and how everything will turn out when we start cutting and montaging on monday! 

And this is what it looks like. The equipment
we got from University is worth 10k €.
Please don't break it - it's on my insurance!

But I too, once again, realize, how much work this is. And how fun it is! I can really see myself there, practically producing and developing movies. Telling stories for a living. This would be a dream coming true! 
It is hard work, it eats up your time. You have to focus but don't get lost in the details, there's still a schedule to follow and a dead line to meet. But in the end, you have your product, the story, the film. You have your creative effort in thing and you can show it to people, let it act on them. How do they perceive it? Can we communicate and discuss it?

Questions and thoughts like these are so interesting & fascinating to me. I want to change people's minds, I want to touch people's views, I want to give them words or pictures to make them wonder. 

Good news ahead: Next week, when we are cutting (and I'm hopefully desperately finishing my politics paper on the clash of civilizations), my best friend comes to visit me! Yeah 3X (quoting Chris Brown 'n' stuff). I'm really really glad to see him. We manage to stay in touch decently. But still, it's different in real life. Hugging and bitch slaps and that kind of stuff... ;)


He goes to (f*cking) San Francisco in August! I will miss him so much, but I'll better work to visit him there or I'm going to kick my own ass. And I'm taking Spanish courses this semester ! (but this is kind of irrelevant at this point...) 
Anyway, he visits me next week and he's going to meet my boyfriend for the first time and we will get drunk together. Long story short: It will be awesome!

If this is how Picasso liked to kiss, I'm worried about his partners...

Like the memories of Paris, the endless whinings about my romances, the sorrows and troubles and joys of my daily life and my wondering about bigger things - I keep them all in my diary.

#lifegoals: Being as cool as Charlotte
from The Subways

side note: This very best friend mentioned was the only person who was ever allowed to read (selected parts) of my diary. Yeah, THAT level of "best-friend-ship"

Here on my blog, too. But there's still some things that I only say to myself. But what's funny, and what I like to share with you (3 other people who read this and future-Lotta, of course, don't forget ya) are the headlines of my entries. 
I always write the exact time, the headline and the date, seperated by commas in the first line of a page.

Examples (translated to English):

20:38 h / I am a lying bitch / 6.8.14
18:01 h / The end. The beginning. / 8.8.14
0:50 h / Guerilla Art & riding my bike / 30.8.14 
1:31 h / Tinder again, being lonely / 21.9.14
1:05 h / new beginning - AGAIN, Freiburg / 12.10.14
0:03 h / Memories of Paris / 13.10.14
4:20 h / new people, Moritz, cafeteria party / 24.10.14
2:08 h / Just Like The Movies / 31.10.14
23:19 h / Independence + crying / 23.11.14
1:04 h / I already miss you - nobody's got time / 19.12.14
15:36 h / Cologne & a new year / 1.1.15
23:51 h / Spontaneous visit! + film production / 26.2.15

... If you'd take stats, you could figure I'm a night owl. And a ordinary girl who kind of cries a lot. (And speaks too loud, but that's another story). I don't know if you're interested in my diary. It seems you kinda are, since you are here, reading this shit. I really love you for doing this, honestly. I love you for caring about my life. You're not obliged to. I love you.

#Lifegoals: Appartment with balcony in Paris

My love for this place never gets old.

I said "Life goes on". And nowhere you can see this clearer than in Paris. 2 months after the terrorist attacks and assassinations, life flows by like ever before. The curfew of going to the park in Kindergarten has ended, finally. You spot graffitis of "JE SUIS CHARLIE" at every corner. And at République people still light candles when it gets dark and draw pens on the statue. But the city never stops moving. It eats people up, incidents get forgotten. Or at least buried under new ones. People have lives. Lives don't stop moving. People don't stop moving, either. It is our mechanism against fear. Against hopelessness, desperation - loneliness. Moving on, going a step further, leaving stuff behind. Lala - Life goes on. 
Sometimes it's easy.
But sometimes it's hard.

There are still people lighting candles every night.
There are still people who care.