Sunday, 21 December 2014

FUCK YOUR PREJUDICE I'M A FEMINIST

Suddenly, right after the Sam Pepper incident the internet was full of videos about sexual assault. There were so many people that called him out (e.g. Laci Green). And there appeared many  girls and women who were sharing their stories about their personal experiences with sexual assault and harassment. They were called "attention whores" and I really don't know how many of them are but I hope none. I hope that they were honest and just to ashamed to talk about what happened to them in public before others spoke up and encouraged them.



I am so lucky that nothing like this ever happened to me. But I am female (obviously). 
And even in a Western, enlighted, "equal" society like ours in Germany, Europe, I don't feel safe. I walk home alone and I am afraid of rapists, of assault, of someone trying to take advantage of me. Why?

 What is this fucked up world where you can't feel safe? Where several men rape a student in a bus in India, or a girl is raped in my hometown or a "jogger" jumps out of the bush and touches women who walk their dogs. I live in a country where only about 8% of the reported/denounced offenders are charged for their actions. 
It says: Excoriate Rape! The black figures are the rapists,
the light pink ones are the reported ones,
the darker pink are the verdicted/charged rapists.
I'm always shocked when I see this.

 I don't only think these people are mentally ill. They are. But at the same time, I think the problem lies in society - in our values and beliefs. 

 That make some men think that it is okay to behave like they behave.
It starts with feeling unsafe at night , catcalling on the street (literally EVERY girl experiences this regularly), guys touching you or grabbing you when you are out dancing or on public transport. It's not okay. 

 Watch this video from buzzfeed in which they imagined catcalling with swapped roles.

 The list goes on. Sexual harrassment in the form of words or touching you inappropriately. A guy who forces his girlfriend to have sex even if she doesn't want to. Any kind of sexual action without mutual consent. Men who rape women, girls, children. Who, if they dont kill them, leave emotional scars and mental issues to the victim that won't heal a life-time. 

 I support this new wave of feminism that came with the youtube scandal and I don't think it is bad. Why do I have to defend myself for being a feminist?

 In my studies I've got a clue why feminism (after the high in the 80s) started to become uncool.
The movement split up in different groups. Like in any political movement, there were extreme forms of feminism who came to the conclusion that men are the source of all evil. And as a result "ALL MEN ARE BAD". These are the feminists who are called out to be men-hating lesbians (often also seen as aggressive, not feminine and assexual). 
Victim-blaming is a severe problem
of sexual assault.
(experienceproject.com)
Other split-ups were women who said: "We achieved euality in law, our work here is done. We now can get back to being feminine and show in wearing pink and flowers and cooking that we're proud of being women". The great split-up and the massive appearance of the first split-up group in public brought a negative image to the movement of feminism, which was in the first place (as you can look up in the dictionary, a movement to achieve the equality of sexes and not to benefit one gender over another). 

 Equality is fine. Isn't it? I don't hate men.
I just hate patriarchal men who think it is their birth right to dominate over women. In the work place, at home, in sexual situations - anywhere. These men are assholes. I hate assholes.

 I can say, that none of my male friends is an asshole like that. I'm happy to say that. But these men still exist. And what I'm trying to force here is to get feminism back into discourse. I like that new wave, keep that going, talk about feminism again!
It's not alright and okay now, because the laws do not keep their promises. There is no equality in payment, in leading positions in jobs, in the families and there's no equality in school.

 When your teacher still tells you: "You shouldn't do computer science, because you're a girl." Or "you can't play football, because boys are better at it." Or "you shouldn't take French because as a boy, you would sound "gay" and girlish speaking it". And "don't do the ballet dancing class because it would look ridiculous!"

 Stop it guys! Overthink your prejudice and the things you repeat parrot-fashion without reflecting them. Be against gender roles and against feminism! Why has this woman in the parfume ad has to be naked? Why do girls have to love cooking and puppets and pink? Why can't boys be emotional, talk about their feelings and cry? Why is it special to be a female in politics or natural sciences? 
OVERTHINK! Everyone gains from it. Expect rapists and patriarchal assholes. 

 But I think I'm fine with that. 








sources & further reading:
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